The Journey That Grew Me

I was a super shy girl before. I still remember that I once took the chance to be the student who wrote down the names of the noisy classmates in elementary school, but my friends kept disturbing and being noisy. For me, that was such an annoying experience, because I thought I couldn’t control the class well. Even though I was trying to keep the class quiet just like they should. After that, I thought that I didn’t have a good ability to lead.

But when I went to junior high school, I entered a school where I didn’t know anyone at all. WKWKWK. As a super shy but embarrassingly shy kid, I started trying to make friends and be brave to answer my teacher’s questions. It was in junior high that I first felt what it was like to be heard. There, I also learned to trust my own abilities more.

Everything totally changed when I was in senior high school, wkwkkw. The super shy Nissa was forced to think using her brain because I joined Paskibra, where all the activities required interruptions and rational thinking. Sometimes there were moments when I didn’t want to think because, well, I just wanted to give up. But giving up until I got tired? AAAA NOT THIS TIME, BESTIE.

The result I got? Wow, this girl improved so well. WKWKW. Alhamdulillah ‘ala kulli haal. I learned so many things from there. The good, the bad, and everything in between. I truly found lessons I never expected.

Now, people know me as a super cheerful girl. I’ve always been like that since I was a kid. But if now you know me as someone who speaks clearly and has the courage to be seen, that’s one of the results of Paskibra. Because honestly, speaking while everyone in a forum is staring at you 😭😭😭

I mean, I’m thankful for every stage of life I’ve been through. Thanks to those stages, I’ve learned and grown not just as a child, but as a human being striving to be insan kamil. Trying to be a person who is obedient and has a role in life. In school, I learned to speak. In college, I learned about idealism and the spirit to fight. If I hadn’t joined UKMI, maybe I wouldn’t have appreciated the small things I hold dear today. Biidznillah, all these learning places. May they bring goodness to me and benefit to those around me.

Barakallahu fiik!